[Humor] 8 Worst Push Notifications that Justify App Uninstall

It was the easiest post ever.

That’s a sadistic statement perhaps. It shouldn’t be easy to find ‘worst’ push notifications.

But unfortunately, our mobile devices are swamped with them. One look at the phone and you have countless notifications, in-waiting desperately begging your attention, more than often in the most ludicrous manner possible.

Push notification as a channel has been so royally screwed by mobile marketers like there is no tomorrow. Why?

  • It makes your messaging unavoidable. It doesn’t sink in the inbox like email or vanishes in the social media chaos, it’s on the face. A user has to act to take it off his home screen. (this warrants a whole new post)
  • It offers CTR as high as 40%
  • It works in a permission based arrangement so there is no question of ending up in the spam folder.

The above-mentioned reasons give enough motivation to marketers to exploit it just as they exploit any other channel that works out for them. Further, with the introduction of geofencing abilities, the exploitation has become more profound.

But at the end of the day, it’s the user who controls the inflow of push notification and their distrust with it is quite evident by the decline in opt-in rate. Also, because it is more convenient and ergonomically easier to uninstall the app than to go to the setting and change preferences push notification often becomes the reason for uninstall.

In this post, we have curated few of the best manifestations of the marketers’ abuse of ‘push notification as a channel’, some from really prominent brands. We suggest taking inspiration from them only to avoid them in the future.

1. The one with all the questions

“Damn”!

This is what I and my friends would have responded. I won’t judge others.

But on second thought, it seems like the marketer is trying to leverage the trick of invoke-mystery-to-increase-clicks but ends up sounding like a Jocelyn Wildenstein’s inner conscience.

 

worst push notification

2. The one which believes that everybody on this earth loves Lena Dunham

Obviously, there is a group of people out there who would like to follow every update on Linsday Lohan’s dalliances, Paris Hilton’s fashion faux pas, Angelina Jolie’s newest kid and stuff like that, but there is a sizeable population out there which still got a real job. Brands have to respect that.

push notification message example

3. The one which was nominated for not-my-job oscar

When you are late for the date, but have a strict mandate to send the notifications.

the lazy push notification

4. The one which had everything but sense

If a user has paid you to send him push notifications but you have run out of ideas still I believe one can still imagine a better message than the master crap that you see below.

push notification abuse

5. The one with the “World’s MOST IMPORTANT NEWS”

This message speaks differently to different people:

To the Republicans- Sarcasm number CDXXCL

To a POTUS aspirant- Lesson number XXLMNC

To normal people- spam

To Hillary Clinton- LOL

push notification for news alert

6. The one with the “World’s IMPORTANT NEWS 2.0”

This is the continuation of the previous message and apart from rationalizing uninstall also explains why journalism industry needs a Jesus.

bad push notification for news alert

7. The one when the app had a Thug Life

Had this app been a human being I am sure it would have had written- “Mah App, Mah Rulez” on it’s facebook bio.

funny push notification

8. The last and the uselassy, meaninglassy, dumbassy one

The dude who designed this notification is perhaps the freelance-motivational-speaker-in-making but stuck in a bad job and perhaps showed up at work drunk that day.

how not to write push notification

Do you like to nominate anyone? Or, do you think we have been too harsh on someone from the list? Share your thoughts in the comments.

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